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How well do you know someone?
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33 Views
11/21/06
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I'm assuming that most people on this site are looking for a deep meaningful relationship. When you meet someone online that you really connect with what's the best way to probe their minds and decide if they are keepers? I've found that word association games and well thought out questions that call for more than a yes or no answer work really well. Of course you have to take care that this doesn't become a Q&A session. You don't want the other person to feel like you're grilling them. You can turn it into a game with the only condition being that you both answer honestly. lol The only drawback is that you have to be prepared for the response you get and not judge. Here are some sample questions that I like to ask:
1. If you could be a cartoon character for a day, which character would you want to be and why? (This reveals a persons playful side and will show how serious they really take themselves)
2. If you were shopping and the clerk gave you more money back, what would you do? What if you found a wallet in the store that had several large bills inside what would you do?
(Of course honesty is a very important trait in a partner)
3.Do you wish you could be a kid again? What age would you go back to and why?
(This question gives you a little insight into their childhood and family experiences)
Does anyone else have suggestions on getting to know someone that you've met online?
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Open Relationships
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106 Views
11/17/06
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Bizarre though not uncommon apparently. I was listening to the radio in my car today and the topic was "open relationships" or relationships were there exists an understanding that either partner is allowed to go outside the relationship as long as the other partner is made fully aware. The host of the show presented this question....How far are you willing to go to preserve your relationship? Would you be willing to adopt this type of "understanding" with your partner in order to hold on to them? My answer? Hmmmm, can you say HELL NAH? Maybe I'm old fashioned but why mess with an institution that is time tested and couple approved? If it was good enough for my grandparents and parents then its damn sure good enough for me. FIDELITY! I want the entire package and if my partner is not ready for that commitment then he needs to follow the advice of the illustruous Ms. Badu and "call Tyrone, tell him I said come on help you get yo s---" (lol) In other words a man like that must be released to new opportunities. I'm sure that there are some that would disagree with me so all are welcome to comment.
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Say What?
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17 Views
11/17/06
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A good friendship can really mellow you out. I'm adoring my friend in Japan. He's definitely one of the good guys. But I almost lost a little of my fire there. (lol) Well I'm back and ready to do some gentle ribbing as respects the opposite sex. (LOL) I had some time to kill and decided to compile a list of boyfriend no-no's for all the ladies that are single and looking. Once you read this I'm sure you'll agree that these types are NOT good "relationship-type" candidates. Hey if you can think of any others to add to the list please feel free.
1. The mamma's boy:
This is the guy that either lives with his mother or within spitting distance of her. She has helped him decorate his pad and they go out to dinner faithfully every Sunday. His refrigerator is filled with neatly labeled tupperware dishes of food that mom has prepared for the week. Ok, this one should be obvious but in case it isn't: ladies we want to avoid this type. He will never leave his mother. God forbid she doesn't like you; you will catch hell everyday that the two of you are together, believe it.
2. The Bodybuilder:
Wow, this guy looks melt in your mouth sweet BUT he is self centered and married to the gym. He probably has photos of himself strewn all over the house. He has a lifetime membership at the local gym or worse has his own home gym. And he likes trophies on his wall and his arm. You'll probably end up being another flavor-of-the-month. Be careful. (lol)
3. The Womanizer:
Now the name alone should put us on alert. This guy is always impeccably dressed and impressive. He's the cute preppy type with perfectly manicured finger nails and great hair and skin. (Yeah I'm a sucker for that too) He'll treat you like a princess, always knowing what to say and do in every situation. He's thought of everything. The only flaw: he'll probably have trouble remembering your name since he's juggling so many different chicks at the same time. Also, if the phone goes off during the date and he takes the call and walks into the other room.....watch out, he's probably making arrangements to pick "her" up an hour after your date has ended.
4. The Workaholic:
He's ambitious (now what woman wouldn't find that quality attractive in a man?) He always looks professional and smells great. He eats at the finest restaurants and is very cultured. The down side, he's married to his job. Expect constant phone interruptions during your dates. Haha, he probably sleeps with his blue tooth earpiece on. (lol)
5. The Dude:
I personally think that a lot of women have a secret desire to be wooed by a bad-boy type. Well here's the skinny on that. This guy has never outgrown his adolescence and has only had two really serious relationships in his life....his dog and his car. (lol) He'll probably ask you out on a date that involves you cooking dinner for him. If you're sexy that's a plus for you because he'll want to flaunt you to be admired by his friends. Oh, btw if you're looking for him you're best bet will probably be the local pub, or dance club or sports bar. He spends his weekends hanging out with his friends watching football, or basketball or boxing. All conversations will center around him because he will think that his life is so much more interesting than yours. (lol) He is self-centered, selfish and unevolved. He doesn't like children because he doesn't want to share his finances or emotional support. The best way to get rid of him: Ask him to marry you (lol)
Oh btw, that's a picture of Gerardo aka "Rico Suave"
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Guy Talk Translated
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57 Views
09/28/06
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LOL, have you ever wondered what men really mean when they say stuff? Well here is some insight for ya. This is priceless.
1. "It would take too long to explain" Translation: "I have no idea how it works"
2. "I was listening to you, its just that I have things on my mind." Translation: "I was wondering if that redhead over there is wearing a bra"
3. "That's interesting, dear" Translation: "Are you still talking?"
4. "I can't find it" Translation: "It didn't fall into my hands so how the hell should I know?"
5. "What did I do this time?" Translation: "What did you catch me doing?"
6. "You look terrific" Translation: "Oh, God, please don't try on another outfit, I'm starving"
And my all time favorite:
7. "Im not lost....I know exactly where we are" Translation "No one will ever see us alive again"
LOL, you gotta love men.
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Interesting but useless facts
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117 Views
09/19/06
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I had some time to kill so I figured what the hell. lol
Here are some interesting but totally useless facts:
Did you know that it is illegal in Willowdale, Oregon, for a husband to curse during sex?
Did you know that it takes 17 muscles to smile and 43 to frown?
If a child burps during a church service in Omaha, Nebraska did you know that his or her parents may be arrested? Good thing I don't live in Nebraska, my 3 year old thinks burping is an art form. lol
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Have you ever longed for someone?
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66 Views
09/19/06
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Have you ever had a longing so deep that it threatened to take your next breath? Have you ever been in love? Every waking moment centers on thoughts of him and you replay imaginery scenarios in your head of his reactions to mundane situations. What if you've never stood in his presence? Would you feel utterly ridiculous at the realization of being overcome by such a longing? When you close your eyes can you smell his skin? Can you feel his touch, the slight imperfections on his fingertips as they trace your form? Do you gaze at his photograph studying the curvature of his lips and long for that first kiss? Have you ever longed for someone? When you lie in bed at night can you feel him beside you? Do you feel an overwhelming desire to turn to him in an exchange of lovers banter that you've played over and over in your mind? Does the sound of his voice awaken every molecule of your being making you feel as though you've never truly lived before that moment? How do you tell him of your longing? How do you make him understand that your desire transcends the physical manifestations of love? Can you capture the innocence in words that will awaken his heart to the prospect? Should you even tell him? "Postponed expectation makes the heart sick". How true the words of the Bible writer.
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Would you hire a wing woman?
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63 Views
09/18/06
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I read something that was positively bizarre on the internet the other day (imagine that, lol) Apparently there is an agency that hire's out professional female date coach', if you will, for a nominal fee to accompany a man and pretend to be his plutonic "friend" while he scours the local bars for Miss Right. Haha, this professional posing as the "friend" will wait for him to zoom in on a target and will casually strike up a conversation with said target and lead her back to his table making formal introductions. What could be more innocent, a good guy and his female friend sharing drinks? The only problem with this scenario is if the guy and girl of his affection hit it off how awkward to have to explain what happened to your female friend from that night. Call me crazy, but any relationship that begins based on a lie is never a good one. LOL, so not only do we have to keep our radars tuned to catch the bottom feeders that lie on their profiles but now we have to be on the lookout for "Prince Charming and his rent-a-friend" companion.
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Is Romance Outdated?
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144 Views
08/28/06
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Romance can be defined as an ardent emotional attachment or involvement between people; love. Based on this definition, should romance ever become outdated? I've had several men tell me that once they "get" a woman they no longer feel the need to woo her as they did before establishing the relationship. I say, what a cheat!!! I think the same things done to capture a persons interest should be done to keep the interest strong. I would never encourage infidelity, but I find it strange that these neanderthal are the same ones that can't figure out why their significant others have run off with someone else. They are often the ones that say "women are all the same, they have unrealistically high expectations." Well damn, if cuddling or holding hands while walking or even lighting a few candles during dinner is unrealistic then I guess these men deserve to be alone. None of that stuff is hard to implement and its cheap (lol)....if you want to be technical. I'm not trying to be profound with this one, just had a little extra time on my hands and figured I'd throw this one out there. HaHa.
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Why are we deceived?
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77 Views
08/28/06
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So many female members on this site, including myself, have dealt with heartbreak of one form or another. More and more often I'm hearing women complain about being dealt a blow (emotionally speaking) from a married man who was less than honest about his relationship status. These women are intelligent, articulate, vivacious women that all seemed to have been duped by some ruthless individual. Why are we so often times fooled by these men? It's definitely not a lack of intelligence because obviously these women are accomplished and that didn't happen by chance. Could it be that we become so desperate in our search for Mr. Right that when we find a potential candidate we put on blinders to things that may seem suspicious? I really don't know since I've never been involved with a married man either knowingly or unknowingly. I would certainly welcome some insight on the subject.
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Are we expecting too much?
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123 Views
08/21/06
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I've read several comments from women on this site regarding the shortage of good men in the world. Could it be that we have unrealistic expectations? I received a funny email the other day from a friend of mine that has been married to his wife for over 15 years....what a funny commentary on what women and men need to make them happy.
How to Make a Woman Happy
It's not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be:
a friend, a companion, a lover, a brother, a father, a master, a chef, an electrician, a carpenter, a plumber, a mechanic, a decorator, a stylist, a sexologist, a gynecologist, a psychologist, a pest exterminator, a psychiatrist, a healer, a good listener, an organizer, a good father, very clean, sympathetic, athletic, warm, attentive, gallant, intelligent, funny, creative, tender, strong, understanding, tolerant, prudent, ambitious, capable, courageous, determined, true, dependable, passionate, compassionate
WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
give her compliments regularly, love shopping, be honest, be very rich, not stress her out, not look at other girls
AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:
give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself, give her lots of time, especially time for herself, give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes
IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:
Never to forget:
* birthdays
* anniversaries
* arrangements she makes
HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY
1. Show up naked
2. Bring food
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I'll have the beefcake please.
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127 Views
08/17/06
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We are all sexual creatures, but societies portrayal of intimacy has become grossly distorted. How important is sex in a relationship? Really, should it be the foundation of a relationship? What if the person you've fallen for is not exactly compatible sexually or not able to perform because of a physical condition? This is actually not so far fetched. Do you walk away or seek comfort in the arms of another? Can it really be love if you allow sex or a lack thereof to dictate how loyal you are in a relationship? I'm curious what other's think
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Cheesecake anyone?
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28 Views
08/15/06
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Some people may think I've lost my mind for writing this blog but I'm in a domestic mood so I'm sharing my recipe for pumpkin cheesecake. Yummy:
INGREDIENTS:
Crumb Crust:
1 cup graham-cracker crumbs
3 tablespoons margarine or butter, melted
2 tablespoons sugar
Pumpkin Filling:
2 packages (8 ounces each) cream cheese, softened
1 1/4 cups sugar
1 can (16 ounces) solid-pack pumpkin (not pumpkin-pie mix)
3/4 cup sour cream
2 tablespoons bourbon or 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon ground allspice
1/4 teaspoon salt
4 large eggs
Sour-Cream Topping:
1 cup sour cream
3 tablespoons sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
Crystallized ginger strips for garnish
DIRECTIONS:
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. In 9" by 3" springform pan, with fork, stir graham-cracker crumbs, melted margarine or butter, and sugar until moistened. With hand, press mixture onto bottom of pan. Tightly wrap outside of pan with heavy-duty foil to prevent leakage when baking in water bath later. Bake crust 10 minutes. Cool completely in pan on wire rack.
2. In large bowl, with mixer at medium speed, beat cream cheese until smooth; slowly beat in sugar until blended, about 1 minute, scraping bowl often with rubber spatula. With mixer at low speed, beat in pumpkin, sour cream, bourbon or vanilla, cinnamon, allspice, and salt. Add eggs, 1 at a time, beating just until blended after each addition.
3. Pour pumpkin mixture into crust and place in large roasting pan. Place pan on oven rack. Carefully pour enough boiling water into pan to come 1 inch up side of springform pan. Bake cheesecake 1 hour 10 minutes or until center barely jiggles.
4. Meanwhile, prepare Sour-Cream Topping: In small bowl, with wire whisk, beat sour cream, sugar, and vanilla until blended. Remove cheesecake from water bath, leaving water bath in oven, and spread sour-cream mixture evenly over top. Return cake to water bath and bake 5 minutes longer.
5. Remove cheesecake from water bath to wire rack; discard foil. With small knife, loosen cheesecake from side of pan to help prevent cracking during cooling. Cool cheesecake completely. Cover and refrigerate cheesecake at least 6 hours or overnight, until well chilled. Remove side of pan to serve. Garnish with crystallized ginger.
This stuff is sinfully rich. It serves 16 and has 310 glorious calories per slice. Why is it that the best tasting foods are also the most fattening? Enjoy. If anyone would like to post a recipe of their own that would be great.
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To all the hunters
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91 Views
07/27/06
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This blog is not directed to men only because there are some ruthless women out there as well. I've been noticing a trend and hearing some pretty sad stories of betrayal. Seems like there are hunters lurking on this site looking to prey on sincere individuals in search of lasting relationships. That's pretty despicable even for a "playa" It is beyond me to imagine why someone would deliberately exploit the honest affections and emotions of another person. What type of stimulus are you getting out of it? Really? Perhaps the satisfaction of knowing that you have crushed a gentle spirit like you were crushed in the past? Why not find the person that hurt you and rain havoc on them? One could say, just don't get emotionally involved. However our need for emotional closeness is what makes us human and seperates us from the animals. Once we stifle that need, we are just animals in search of flesh. Lifestyles differ and I by no means want to dictate morality but stop preying on individuals that are honest hearted. In closing I'd like you to keep in mind that while you play the "hunter" we will be playing another game.....pin the tail on the asshole. The next time you log on to read a hot blog you just might find your name in lights as the juicy topic for conversation.
A side note to those of you that have suffered hurt....keep your head up and don't allow the assholes to extinguish your fire. Don't become callous hunters, the world can't afford to lose any more gems. There are so few of us left as it is.
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How well do you communicate?
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122 Views
07/11/06
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It is quite obvious that men and women don't convey thoughts and ideas in the same manner. However there should be a common courtesy policy that applies to all relationships, plutonic or otherwise. Now I'm gonna trip on this for a little while because I hate to waste my time and I don't relish wasting the time of others; so here goes: If you are looking for a quick fling then be upfront. We are all adults here. State your purpose so that you can attract like-minded individuals. Hint: You are not being polite by stringing someone along with empty promises when all you're really looking for is a romp. For those of you still unclear about the concept of friendship...this does not necessarily mean "friends with benefits". When in doubt, ask. The cat and mouse games are so high school. Impress us by demonstrating that your level of maturity matches your age. Well I'm done ranting. If anyone would like to comment, knock yourself out.
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What is your definition of sexy?
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247 Views
06/29/06
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This one is a broad one and purely open to interpretation. There is no "right" or "wrong" answer. I guess the definition has a lot to do with perspective, personal experience and preferences. Personally, I find intellectual prowess to be incredibly sexy. The idea of meeting someone that I can stay up with til 3am talking over a cup of coffee makes me weak in the knees. It just enhances any physical intimacies that may follow. What are your thoughts?
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